Saturday, December 10, 2005


OK... We have all stubbed our toes before. I am not talking about the dingger, I talking about the kind where if your foot would have followed through on it's course you would have kicked a 45 yard field goal. The pain is so instantaneous that it feels like it was staging a preemptive strike on your nervous system. Like there are sensors down there that alert the brain to the certain dome of your big toe.
I want to talk about the worst two types of kicks and the natural reaction.

The first one is the "your moving quickly almost running and you just smash any of your toes into something low" This I believe is the most common and generally draws the common reaction which is to fall down or hop to something to fall down on, then you just hold it and try and pretend the pain away.

The second is what I feel is the worst. You again are moving quickly when you come in contact with a firm stationary object. But when you drop kick that mother your toes split on the object. Causing you to think of childbirthing, and that you COULD handle that pain,but this...this is just too much. The reaction to this is sometimes the drop, you know what I mean. Or my personal preference is the runaway. Where you take off from the scene of the crime like a felon hoping that the pain will be left behind. But alas it is not, which is why you spend the next five minutes staring at your toe,wondering if you could exist without it.

I often wonder why there is so much feeling in that part of the body, like a little nerve bank down there. Like all the nervous that should have been in your elbow skin and scalp are all down there in the very tip of your big and little toe.


samb said...


Funny you should post this...i did this yesterday...but let me preface this by saying, about a month ago, my wife split her toe open, and a blood blister was developing under her toe nail and causing her great pain. Now I myself, take pride in the fact that i tolerate pain very well. I was that kid in highschool, that when pinched on the back of the arm or given a titty twister, i just stared at them and foiled their rotten plans to pain me.

When my wife hurt her toe, she asked me "Honey, what I hurts." In an attempt to be completely sensitive and sympathetic to my wife told her to shut her mouth, quit talking and thinking about it, and NUT UP and go to bed. I can tell you now...that didnt work for her, like it works for me.

A couple days ago, I did the same...i am standing there looking down at my foot, not trying to think about my toe that is on fire, and my wife looks at me and says

"Oh quit thinking about it, and nut up."

What the... said...

you told your wife to Nut Up! Aaron, you are concerned about your elbow skin? What the F?

What the... said...

i told my patient that story tonight who had his legs blown off and he was crackning up so hard I thought he was going to seriously...

diddy.9000 said...

i have this little insensitivity sensor in my head that is telling me to say something crude and . . . well, insensitive. but after reading about the guy who had his legs blown off, i feel that i should keep my damn mouth shut.

have you ever gone around a corner too fast in your bare feet and only four toes made it around the corner? that little piggy can never keep up.

BigToesZYPREXA said...

Ouch thats painfull, i feel for you. keep it on ice and elevated, good luck.

when you have done something stupid the chances are that during the next 24 hours you wont be paying attention and you may just injure your self twice.

Dont drive on Zyprexa (i know you dont need it but...)you may crash and blame someone you can see.

DrD said...

Just reading your post gives me that deep down in the pit of my stomach sensation that I am going to blow chips, that toe hurts so bad!

But childbirth, no way. I have to guess that like me, you have seen that. Ain't no way! Makes me glad I was born with the three family jewels. Well, OK, so maybe I was born with the normal compliment of two, got the third one later. It is coming out in 9 days. Got a feeling that is going to hurt worse than any toe.

Jeremy said...

nice dude.